Monday, July 29, 2013

Basic (but Bad *ss) BROWNIES

What is the big stinking deal with brownies these days? There are a zillion recipes out there that make these grand claims about having 'such and such' type of brownie, and a lotttt of the times, it's total bs.
So imma give it to you straight up. The deal with this here particular brownie is:

Sunday, July 28, 2013


Preparing 'perfect' pancakes is a particularly precarious, and personal problem for a plethora of people.

i'm probably proficient at producing and prolonging the powerful and persuasive post of P's. But, ph*ck it; i'm passive and not persistent enough. Period. okay, i'm done. 

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Thick and Chewy Oatmeal-Chocolate-Cranberry cookies

So this happened yesterday...
I had just finished posting the copycat-krispy-kreme-donuts recipe and oddly enough had a huge craving for oatmeal cookies... but not my usual outrageous oatmeal chocolate chip cookies... no sir. These had to be different, with an over-abundance of oats, chips and something different, like say, dried cranberries. oh melissa, you creative girl you. hah. ya right. 

Friday, July 19, 2013

Copycat 'KRISPY KREME' donuts

So i embarked on an arduous* process on tuesday night, which i feel many people would frown upon, given the pre-conditions to starting ...For one it was already 9pm; Secondly, it wasn't even hump day yet; and thirdly, i was slightly drunk. Nah i'm just kidding. But i should have been. I'm not sure what other people do on their tuesday nights; probably more normal things like sitting in a movie theatre gorging themselves on popcorn because it's 'cheap tuesday', and tbh who the f*ck can afford to watch regular priced movies anymore??? But no, my brother coaxed me into making homemade donuts. Which wasn't the least bit regrettable, but probably something you'll wanna start earlier in the day or earlier in the night even.  

Sunday, July 14, 2013


yes, the picture sucks #getoverit #meanie

this meal is super cheap and easy (just like me) and it's a totally delicious crowd-pleaser. When i say crowd-pleaser, i really mean that all people, and even the most pickiest of eaters are sure to enjoy this. My sister for example, who prefers "tube cookies"* over homemade cookies enjoys it. cookies...ANYways. The picture doesn't quite justify it, but at least you get the idea. If you have never had food such as this, fear not, because it is like the kettle corn of meats. Is that a weird image? maybe a little. But still ah-may-zing. 

Tuesday, July 9, 2013


that's the melted icing, not what you THINK** it looks like.

I think cinnamon buns have a bad rap of being difficult and time consuming; now while i wouldn't say they are easy to make, they aren't all that complex, and let's face they give you a good work out if you do it all by hand! and you will probably feel it the next day if you're a weak little sh*t like me. This particular kind that i make are delicious, soft, flavourful and gooey, and comparable to those certain delicious-but-horrendously-expensive type of buns at the mall*.  Seriously a no-fail recipe. And to make it that much better, they are actually ready to eat in 90 minutes! 

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Clean Eating and What it Means to Me

i like to eat ‘clean’, and for me that means staying the h*ll away from processed foods. i am not a strict clean eater, because let’s face it, i stinking love sugar… i am by no means a health nut, i follow no strict regimen, and i do enjoy the occasional chocolate milkshake, or more notably, a cold brewski. #yesiamofage #drinkresponsibly #whouseshashtagsinablogpost #loser

Friday, July 5, 2013

Bootylicious Banana Muffins

if you place two beside each other really close, they do resemble a fine buttocks. 

Banana Muffins are a fantastic way to enhance your curves. I'm not sure how many calories these babies rack up per serving but I can only imagine it's huge, just like your *ss after eating them. haha. I'm only jokingggg. 

But that is why I said they are Bootylicious.